love

Flora loved everyone today. She spontaneously gave us all hugs and kisses throughout the day and often said "I LOVE you, Mommy" with such conviction that you'd think she actually realized all that I do for her. But no . . . that's not possible.

At one point this evening, she lovingly embraced the whole family and said, "I LOVE you, Mommy. I LOVE you, Daddy. I LOVE you, Timber. I LOVE you, Scout. And I even love God! And I even love Mary and Joseph. And I even love baby Jesus!"

Ah, I love that silly girl....

scout and the princess

Boys can play with princesses too. Scout plays with Flora's new princess dolls. This is what it sounds like when Scout plays with a princess:

"Princess going night-night. Night-night, Princess. Princess in bed. Princess sleeping. Princess wake up! Princess is awake! Princess JUMP on her bed! Whoa! Big jump, Princess!! JUMP! JUMP! JUMP!"

24 1/2 hours

Twenty-four and a half hours! We spent 24 1/2 hours in the car during our Christmas travels!!! I am SO glad that I did not add up our travel time before we left -- I may have changed my mind about the whole thing and just stayed home.

I know a lot of people were praying for our trip and I am thankful for each prayer! Our 24 1/2 hours of travel time went so much better than I ever imagined 24 1/2 hours in the car with a 3-year-old, a 2-year-old, and a 3-month-old would go. All three kids were stellar travelers and thanks to Dora, Diego, and other fictional friends available on DVD I don't remember hearing a single whine or fuss!

We barely missed a couple of winter storms but had clear weather for all of our journey (besides a heavy fog when we left Colorado Springs, but it was 5am so we would have been in a heavy fog regardless of the weather).

All of my prayers for a safe, HEALTHY vacation were answered despite two sick family members in Colorado and two in Arkansas. Flora and Timber developed runny noses but nothing worse. I can't imagine how miserable it would have been if all five cousins had gotten sick in Colorado, so I was immensely relieved when we left Colorado without any sickness. And I was amazed when we left Arkansas without any sickness since the kids always seem to get sick when we visit Siloam Springs! On our third day in Colorado, a family member informed us that she had thrown up during the night and hoped it wasn't a stomach virus. Oh my goodness!! Can you even imagine a stomach virus in a house with five small children and six adults!!?? That would have been blog-worthy for sure!!! --but I'm happy to be spared the experience.

Although twelve days away from home was starting to take its toll by the time we left Arkansas, our Christmas travels were overall a success! We had lots of fun but we're all SO happy to be back home. I prefer our 10-minute bedtime routine to the hour or more it took to get the kids to sleep in Colorado and Arkansas.

Looking forward to some boring days this week!! Sometimes boring isn't so bad.

crazy cool colorado christmas

summing up our colorado trip (with alliteration -- because it just came out that way):

Firetrucks and Fancy Nancy.
Giggles and gallops.
Callie and Christmas.
Elliott and eating.
Family and fights.
Dogs and diapers.
Granny and Grandpa.
Babies and baths.
Fun and fun.

a special gift

Merry Christmas from the Borkerts!

Flora has a special present for everyone!!
(if you don't "get it" then click on the pic to enlarge)

2010 in review

Facebook status updates from 2010 . . . if you keep up with me on facebook then you've already read all of these. I'd forgotten some of them though! I guess you need to read it from the bottom up for it to make sense..... :-)

**********************************************************************

I'm trying to decide which is more important to me: starting the new year with a clean house or ending this year doing something other than cleaning....

A word of advice: if you sign into facebook on your mom's computer make sure you sign out.

Wow... my Mom is so wise. I wish I had appreciated all that wisdom when I was younger. She's pretty cool too. ... always has been. I just ♥ my Mom!

Me: "Are you hungry?"
Chris: "If I had a banana every time someone asked me that . . . I'd never be hungry."
Me: (I don't say anything to that.....because what CAN you say in response to such profound wisdom??)

I love my kids everyday.....but I think I love them even MORE on the days that they all three sleep in until 9am.

It's official, Ladies and Gentlemen -- I am a Fantasy Football Super Bowl Champion!!! I'm scheduling my parade through the city for sometime next week...

I leave my computer unattended for two seconds and come back to find Scout watching a Windows 7 tutorial video????

Upon arriving back home after almost two weeks of Christmas travel, Flora says, "Oh, Mommy! I really like our kitchen!"

Home is calling......

Grandma's Christmas games are awesome!

!!!!ARKANSAS!!!!

Oklahoma!!

And we're off! Long day of driving ahead.....

Three little Borkerts and two not-so-little Borkerts sharing a room......could have been a nightmare but it turned out okay.

Colorado Christmas is wrapping up and Arkansas Christmas is about to begin. An offer to babysit is waiting for us when we get back to KC -- I'm thinking we'll definitely take it!!

First night in CO: Flora and Scout climbed out of their beds and emptied all of our suitcases onto the floor. Second night in CO: Mommy stayed in the room until they were definitely asleep.

Today was probably the best day of Flora's life. She got to watch her shows and drink chocolate milk for 9 hours straight! And today I am thankful for portable DVD players. Good weather, fast trip -- thanks for all the prayers!

Somehow we were able to resist pulling over to view the WORLD'S LARGEST CZECH EGG in Kansas. Sheer willpower.

Kansas makes me crazy.

Timber is 12 weeks old which means today would be my first day back at work if I were going back to work. Been there, done that, didn't like it one bit. SO thankful I get to stay home with these little munchkins.

The Borkert family is attempting a family picture. There WILL be a picture and the whole family WILL be in it.....and that's about all I can promise.

Come home. Get lunch ready for Flora and Scout. Pick up toys and clean up the kitchen a bit. REMEMBER THAT TIMBER IS STILL SLEEPING IN HIS CARSEAT AT THE BOTTOM OF THE STAIRS!! Bring Timber upstairs.

Chris tells me, "You smell like vomit." Thanks, Honey, but I really prefer the term "spit-up."

Well, it's decision time --- either today is laundry day or tomorrow is pajama day.....and they wouldn't necessarily be clean pajamas.

Flora just told me, "Mommy, Jesus is in the bathroom."
Um, ok....And then a minute later, "Mommy, Jesus is out of the bathroom now."
Did Jesus just use my bathroom?? :-) I don't know where she comes up with this stuff!!

Crackling fire. Hot chocolate with marshmallows on top. Sleeping baby. Cute husband. Life is good!

Wishing the deer would just come surrender at our doorstep this year.......

Today I told Scout (in my superexcited voice), "SCOUT! You will be TWO-YEARS-OLD tomorrow!" Unimpressed with my theatrics, he replied, "No, I will be five."

I TOTALLY forgot to feed the kids breakfast before church today . . . major mom fail. Now I know why I was able to get everyone out the door quicker than usual!

Flora tried on a new skirt and Scout said, "Flora is a princess!" What a good brother.

Thanks to Dora, Scout always calls for help in Spanish -- Ayúdeme, Mommy, ayúdeme!!!

I just heard Flora tell Scout to go to pbskids.org. Hmm....maybe a bit too much tv for them since Timber was born.....

Flora says, "Our church is like a house but it has a horn on it." Horn = steeple.

Halloween costumes for the kids: Eeny, Meeny, Miney, and NO MO!! :-)

"punkmans"

Kids: check. Minivan: check. Huge Purse: check. Undereye Circles: check. And today I finally made this mom gig official by getting a perm! "Where my kids at?" :-)

Flora just drew a picture of "Jesus Borkert." Hmm.....

I left a roll of toilet paper in Flora's room so she could blow her nose during the night. Guess what I found this morning? Yep, Flora had tp'd her own room.

"Flora's Special Day" was fun and exhausting. Tonight she pat Timber on the head and told me, "Our new baby will be okay because I'm here and I'm three." I wonder how long he will be "our new baby"?? We bought our van in April and it's STILL "our new van," so I guess the nickname could stick for a while.....

Exactly three years ago I was wandering around Kmart with Chris to distract myself from the painful contractions I was experiencing. Tonight I was frantically rushing into Kmart ten minutes before closing to buy a Dora pinata for my almost-three-year-old baby girl's birthday tomorrow!!

I will take the stained HappyMom t-shirt over the shiny SuperMom cape any day.

I feel like a collector who finally has the complete set. :-)

3 kids down for naps at the same time today!! Woohoo!! This is going to be SO easy...... ;-)

I asked Flora what she wanted for her birthday and she said, "Ummm, a pink cake and candles and balloons . . . and a fork." I guess we'll wrap the fork.

**Timber David Borkert**

8lbs 11oz, 21inches!! Born at 5:40pm. Whew--so glad that's over! He's such a cutie!! (name to be finalized this evening!!)

We had a yummy breakfast-for-lunch at IHOP today . . . or, as Flora called it, IJUMP.

Already this evening, Flora has played in a sandbox and swam in a pool in our living room. I'm glad she has an active imagination so we don't actually need to own a sandbox or a pool!

Flora has a stuffy nose which, according to her, is basically the end of the world.

Today I bought a gallon of milk that expires on my due date. Made me smile and freak out a little.

Scout knocked over Flora's tower of blocks. "Scout," she says, "that was my best friend in the whole wide world!" Hmm....maybe we need to work on finding more friends for Flora.

The kids are already playing together! Flora and Scout like to give the baby "zerberts" and he kicks back. Unfortunately this game leaves me with a stomach covered in toddler slobber and sore ribs. It will be much more fun when they can play without me in the middle!

I can't feed Flora "baby carrots" without explaining where the "mommy carrots" are.

First thing I heard this morning: "Mommy! Mommy! Your baby come out of your belly yet??"

"But Mommy, bugs are still people." ~ Flora

I was really excited to purchase a HUGE bottle of great smelling lotion until I got home and realized it was conditioner.

Chris is talking to a guy from high school on the phone. I'm eavesdropping. They are talking about diapers and potty training. My, my how times have changed! :-)

Dear Friends and Relatives: We do not have a name picked out for this baby. I know that you all think we have a secret name that we're not telling, but honestly, we just don't know. Still taking suggestions......

"You're kinda like a whale," Flora says.

I am thankful for the blessing of an ordinary day. Sometimes boring isn't so bad.

Gotta love the honesty of a 2-year-old......I asked Flora why Scout was crying and she said, "Ummmm, probby 'cause I bite him."

Busy busy weekend......Flora woke up from her nap and said "Let's put my hair in a ponytail so we can go." She was confused when I told her that we weren't going anywhere tonight.

Little girls like to feel pretty and little boys like to feel important......just an observation.

"Mommy, I want to play laundry too!!!"

Scout squeezes his GlowWorm to play music, then very seriously points a finger at it and says "NO," and then burst into giggles. I wish I could bottle his 1-year-old joy and make Flora take a dose of it when she has her I'm-an-emotional-wreck-of-a-2-year-old moments.

Scout must be growing up . . . someone asked me if he and Flora were twins today.

Scout started crying so I asked Flora what she did to him. She said, "I just pimpin' him." Okaaaay . . . after observing, I learned that "pimpin'" = pinching. I wasn't happy about her pinching him, but it's certainly better than "pimpin'" him!

Flora is chasing Scout around the house with kitchen tongs saying, "Don't be scared, Scout, I'm a doctor!" My advise is "run, Scout, run!!"

Flora + Callie + Scout + Elliott = tons of energy and tons of fun but very little clothing.

I finally found a Mommy's Day Out program that meets both my budget and standard of care requirements . . . his name is Chris Borkert and he is excellent. I got so much done this morning!!!

I asked Flora what she wanted to do today. Her answer? "Walk, eat, go poo-poo." I'm fairly certain that today will meet all of her expectations.

Chris says, "Oh crap"...... and Flora says, "Oh crap."

I completed my first ever 5k today . . . 5 months pregnant . . . pushing a double stroller . . . in the rain. I am completely okay with my time of 1 hour 3 minutes!!

Scout's first black eye makes him look like a tough little dude....unfortunately his sister gave him the black eye which significantly lowers his toughness factor.

"Mommy, something stuck in my bum." = Flora's first wedgie.

"Sorry, Flora, we have to leave the park because your brother won't quit eating dirt."

Forgot Scout yesterday. I thought Chris had him; Chris thought I had him. We realized in the driveway (after locking up the house and turning off the lights) that no one had Scout. Looked up to see him plastered against the front window---silently staring at us. :-)

Does every mother have those moments when she thinks, "Man, my kids are WEIRD"??

After getting dressed this morning, Flora looked in the mirror and declared, "Oh, I look wonderful!"

BOY!!!!!!!

BOY or GIRL???? The request line is open for the next 16 hours! :-)

Chris decided we needed fish, so he brought home a goldfish each for Flora and Scout. By the end of the evening, both of the fish were dead. So that wasn't great . . . and then I thoughtlessly fixed fish sticks for lunch today. Oops.

.....and now we have a new goldfish who seems to be adjusting better than the other two --- he's still alive so we're obviously doing something right this time. He is orange and black and his name, of course, is Pink.

This fish is definitely dead.

I've done so many things as a mom that I never imagined I'd do . . . like playing Chris' ukulele and singing the "clean-up sing" while Flora chants "Louder Mommy! Sing louder!"

Today there's a character on Barney named Sir Rip-a-lot. The kids don't understand why I keep giggling.

"Until 10 weeks [in utero], every brain is female. Then, in boys, a huge surge of testosterone hits the brain, killing cells in the communication center and growing them in the sex and aggression center." Haha!!

Scout had no fear on the chick-fil-a indoor playground. He was up the steps and in the tunnels before Flora knew what was going on . . .

Laundry day --- YUCK!! ....but the little pink and blue piles make me smile.

Flora burst into tears while watching Winnie the Pooh. I guess we'll stick with our four staples for a bit longer (Dora, Elmo, Barney and WonderPets). THEY never make her cry. Stupid Tigger.

Chris is implementing a new organization strategy that will revolutionize his life. Unfortunately, his organization is scattered all over the dining room table and floor and piled in my chair.

I played with blocks alone after the kids went to bed because they never let me build the tower that *I* want to build. I think it turned out pretty spectacular.

I couldn't sleep last night and I thought what if Jay married Kay and they had three kids named Elle, Em 'n' Opie . . .

I had no idea that a little red-headed boy would attract so much attention! It's like the hair compels people to comment on its redness.

Day 4 of kids being sick . . . hoping, praying, wishing, dreaming, begging for a vomit-free day tomorrow.

Flora yells, "DRINK!" and Scout runs to fetch it for her. I'm glad they're figuring out this big sister/little brother thing.

My hair is up in a ponytail for the first time in quite a while. Flora just noticed and said, "Oh! So beautiful, Mommy!" LOL . . . Gotta love kids!!

Flora and Chris are playing basketball . . . Flora's version of basketball requires Chris to "WIGGLE WIGGLE" before each shot. I should be recording this!

I bought NEON GREEN paint today so Chris can officially convert the basement to his green screen room. I am an awesome wife.

All these new toys and "mommy-on-the-floor" is still their favorite toy . . .

FIRST status update of 2010 . . . all of my other updates will have to live up to this one . . . that's a lot of pressure.

they make me smile :-)

Beautifully Different. Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful.

My kids do a lot of things that light me up -- can I only pick just one? This will be tough . . . maybe I will pick just one thing from TODAY that made each of them beautifully different.

We went to storytime at the library today for the first time in FOR.EV.ER and Flora and Scout both had a blast. There were stories, songs, a movie, crafts, stickers, stamps for little hands, and new books to take home when it was all over. Our storytime lady (and friend), Ms. Kathryn, passed out bells for one of the songs and Flora's eyes lit up! Last night we went to see Mr. Stinky Feet at a different library and Flora never got picked to be in his "band." It was possibly her first experience with that kind of rejection. She handled it well, but I thought she was a little bit sad. So NOT being in the band last night made being in this storytime band all that more exciting for her. I was sitting in the back watching as she jingled her bells for a while and then she turned around and came back to me with the biggest smile on her face. When Flora REALLY smiles her whole face lights up. I'm sure it's impossible to NOT smile along with her although I've certainly never tried! And then we came home and she brought me a stick and asked me if we could play "Limbo." Her quirkiness also makes me smile. She's a strange one and often full of drama . . . but we love her that way!

Scout is known for his stellar hugs. He gives the best hugs. I don't know how he got to be such a good hugger since I'm sure we taught him and Flora to hug in the same way. Today I put him in bed for his nap and he started asking for various toys to be put into his bed with him. After I thought I had him settled, I headed out of his room. As I was just about to close the door, he yelled, "MOMMY, WAIT! Come here!" Rolling my eyes, I went back into his room expecting another toy request, but found him standing on his bed with his arms thrown wide open. "Mommy," he said, "I want a hug!" And that made me smile.

I don't know much about Timber yet, but he still makes me smile. He loves to "talk" to me with goos and coos and ows. His eyes sparkle when he smiles his silly baby smile. He's warm and soft and squishable. My editor tells me that "squishable" isn't a word . . . it obviously hasn't cuddled Timber. He is nothing if not squishable! He's also heavy and he likes to be held a lot . . . but really, I can't think of a better way to write this blog post than with Timber's face snuggled into my neck like it is right now. Did I mention he's warm? Love it!

Ok, so I didn't exactly follow the prompt today . . . oh well.

did i really just say that?

"Flora, don't run with your eyes closed!"

"Scout, turn around so Flora can smell your bum."

"Flora, smell Scout's bum to see if he's poopy."

"Scout, don't throw the maraca at the Christmas tree!"

"No, you can't have any more celery!"

i think i win

Day 6. Make. What was the last thing you made?

Well, this writing prompt brings up a sore subject for me. I'm not crafty. I think I could be but "making things" has never been high on my priority list. I enjoy it when I'm forced to do it.....but I rarely set out to create something just for creativity's sake. However, I recently realized that I need to do more crafty things with the kids, so we've had a somewhat craftier Fall than usual.

We made a turkey and a turkey-feather-flower. It was supposed to be two turkeys but Scout tore up his turkey's body while I was helping Flora with her feathers. Timber really enjoyed staring at their artwork while getting his diaper changed!


We also made little felt Santa and penguin ornaments! I would love to take credit for these but they were a kit at Target for $5. So easy and so cute!

We also made spiders for Halloween, but I didn't get a pic of those. They were destroyed pretty quickly.

Flora chose to exercise her creative muscles by drawing a family portrait on her wall during naptime. I tried to edit the pic some to make the crayon more visible. There are two big people near the top (Chris & me), two little people holding hands in the middle (Flora & Scout), and one itty-bitty bean-like person in the bottom left corner (Timber). Crayons are no longer allowed off the kitchen table.


Chris created a beautiful water feature and herb garden on our back deck. It's amazing what an improvement this is over what was previously in these spaces.


And I made a baby this year. Pretty crafty of me, huh??

reverb revamped

Ok, I enjoyed my reverb10 posts but this blog is supposed to be about the kids. Soooo, I've decided to continue following the reverb10 prompts but write my responses from the kids' perspectives! We'll see how it goes.....

Day 3. Moment. Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year.

Flora might have felt most alive while playing in a pile of dirt in our backyard earlier this Fall. She spent almost an hour lost in her own little world finding acorns and burying them in a big hole in the dirt pile. Once I observed her lounging in the dirt pile staring at the blue sky and I wondered what she was thinking. It was probably her own little version of LIFE IS GOOD.

Scout must have felt most alive when he learned to jump. Scout is a jumper. He jumps off the ground, he jumps off the fireplace hearth, he jumps off the chair, and he jumps off his daddy's belly. Jumping is obviously something that gives him great pleasure. He had to watch Flora jump off the hearth for several months before he was finally big enough to try it....or before his mommy thought he was big enough to try it! I needn't have worried -- he's a jumping pro!

Timber probably felt most alive when he was born. Just a guess....although it could have been the first time he opened his eyes to view his dark little world or the first sounds he heard with his newly formed ears. Maybe it was the first time he saw his mommy's face or finally managed to get his hands into his little mouth or smiled back at Flora and Scout. Timber is probably acutely aware of being alive every second. It's all still so new to him and there's so much to figure out.

Day 4. Wonder. How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year?

Well, this prompt is kind of silly --- when you are 3-years-old, 2-years-old, and brand spankin' new a sense of wonder does not have to be cultivated. I have found MY sense of wonder heightened just from spending my days with them!

Day 5. Let Go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year?

Flora let go of her pacifier and her diapers! Hooray!

Scout let go of his crib and his fear of strangers.

Timber let go of his perfect little home to come live with us in our not-so-perfect little home.

And Chris and I let go of Toby. We still remember him fondly from time to time. He was a good dog but we were not good dog owners. He's happier now, I'm sure. Dogs do the tough work of preparing a young couple for the responsibility of children and then they get replaced by children in the hearts of their owners. It's very sad. Poor dogs.....it's a good thing they're just dogs so they don't really care.

Rule #6 for posting comments: NO disagreeing with me! This means no "dogs have feelings too" comments allowed here.

the rules

Chris says I should turn the comments feature back on for the blog. I guess I will . . . I usually do what he tells me to do.

HOWEVER, there will be some ground rules for leaving comments:

1. NO parenting advice. I know that sounds horrible, but I just really don't want to read advice on my blog. You are more than welcome to send me an email or facebook message me with all the advice you care to give.

2. NO "you're doing a good job" comments. Some of my posts are laments on my failures as a parent but they are written to be funny, not to elicit encouraging comments.

3. NO anonymous comments. Those are just annoying. I refuse to read or acknowledge anonymous comments.

4. NO questions. I don't like commenting on my own blog to answer a question. Again, you are welcome to email or message me with questions.

5. NO profanity. Ok, I really just added this one because I felt like I needed a 5th rule . . . if you feel that a particular profane word is appropriate for your comment then go for it. I won't judge and I might even laugh! There ARE a few words that will get your comment deleted though . . . and no, I'm not going to list those words!

If you have a comment that doesn't break any of the rules, GO FOR IT! I'm not expecting many though . . . people generally don't like to refer to a list of rules before they write a comment.

In the past, the comments feature has not allowed certain people to comment. I tried to fix it but decided it was easier to just disable the comments feature altogether. If you still can't comment then I'm sorry. Life will probably go on.

Wow, this all sounds very rude. I guess that's just the mood I'm in today. Maybe I'll post a nicer version of "the rules" on another day.

diapers. part ii.

In response to the overwhelming number of emails asking me to write MORE about diapers, I am now prepared to offer my latest opinion on the current state of the diaper situation in America.

No, actually no one has asked me to write about diapers again, but I'm going to anyway. There are things that need to be said. If you need a refresher course on my opinion of the various diaper brands available, you can read my first diaper blog here.

One thing remains the same: Pampers is the best. As far as I have seen, there is absolutely no other diaper brand that comes close to matching the quality of Pampers diapers.

I was recently VERY disappointed by LUVS diapers. I was a loyal LUVS user for a couple years but a couple months ago I purchased a package of LUVS and was disappointed to find that they had changed their diapers. They were no longer my not-as-good-as-Pampers-but-very-close LUVS. After using a few of the newly designed diapers, I realized that they were now not-as-good-as-Pampers-and-only-barely-better-than-generic LUVS. I felt betrayed. I felt embarrassed! After all, I had only recently sung their praises in my blog! How dare they lessen their quality with not so much as a warning!

So, I'm done with LUVS. At least for a while . . . I may give them a second chance eventually, but for now I am a Pampers mom. They cost more, but they make me happy. And they keep the poop in the diaper, which makes everyone happy.

Our recent Thanksgiving guests arrived with two large boxes of diapers (a sure way to ensure a warm welcome at our house!). A question from my dad about how long a box of diapers lasted in our house prompted me to pull out the ol' calculator and figure out an exact answer to his question. Timber goes through approximately eight diapers a day. Some days are slightly more or less, but I think eight is a good average. Timber's box of diapers contains 174 diapers which means that the huge box of diapers will last approximately 22 days. Scout only uses 3-4 diapers per day, so his box of 156 diapers will last somewhere between 40-50 days! Woohoo!

no way, jose!

Reverb10 Day 2
What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?

HAHAHAHAHA!!!! At this moment I am simultaneously blogging, holding Timber, fixing dinner for the kids, breaking up an argument over a school bus, changing a diaper, and softening cream cheese. Ok, not exactly simultaneously, but very nearly. I have also typed all of the previous blog post and most of this post one-handed (as the other hand is occupied holding Timber). It's bringing back memories of typing papers for my Masters classes one-handed while holding a baby Scout in the other arm. I often wondered if I was the only person voluntarily achieving a Masters degree one-handed. Actually, the only reason I am able to blog at all tonight is because Chris left his laptop here while he went hunting! It seems that when I WANT to write there is very little that will deter me. Since the content of my blogs is usually kids/chores/diapers/daily life, I would argue that everything contributes to my writing . . . or maybe nothing does but I write about everything anyway. :-)
I suppose all the other things I do on the computer BESIDES blogging don't contribute to my writing, but can I eliminate those things? Maybe. Do I want to eliminate those things? Nope. I don't need to write that desperately.

Day 1 -- Dec 1st -- Reverb10

Sure, I'll hop on the reverb10 bandwagon! Everyone else is doing it, so . . . yeah, sign me up!

Basically, each day in December the reverb10 website ( http://www.reverb10.com/ ) provides a writing prompt to encourage bloggers to "reflect on this year and manifest what's next." I think it's a cool idea. I know I won't complete all 31 days (I'm already a day behind and I've just started!!), but hopefully it will cause me to blog more often.

Ready. Set. GO!

Day 1 -- Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?

DONE. FINISHED. COMPLETE. Pick a word -- they all describe my feelings for 2010. Timber was born in September 2010 marking the end of my pregnant days. I don't know if anyone else can understand how I feel and it's hard to describe. Relief. Gratitude. Awe. Blessed. Happy. We are officially done with a distinct time in our lives. The babies are born -- now we can focus on raising three great kids. I am just so thankful that we were given three healthy pregnancies and three healthy babies. I have watched so many friends go through heartbreaking experiences with their pregnancies or newborns this year that I find myself feeling overwhelmingly thankful and relieved to have been spared such painful situations. Life is good and God is good and I hope that I would say the same things if this year had been marked by tragedy for us rather than joy.

ONWARD. BEGINNINGS. CHANGE. TRUST. I know for certain that 2011 will be a year of joy and laughter. I know it will be full of joy and laughter because we will choose to be joyful and keep a sense of humor in all situations. Beyond that, I am very uncertain what 2011 will hold. It will be a year of moving on from the pregnancy/newborn years and focusing on something other than growing a baby. Seriously -- I feel like I have been consumed with pregnancy for the past four years -- I'm excited about moving on with my life. I think 2011 will be a year of big changes for us as a family. I'm not sure what those changes will look like, but a year from now I want to look back on 2011 and see a pattern of trust. Trusting God to know what is best for us and hold us in all circumstances. Trusting each other to know the will of God. Trusting my own abilities to respond to change with confidence and excitement.

So, there you go. Obviously, I'm either not good at following instructions or blatantly rebelling against the direction to choose "one word" to summarize 2010 and mark 2011. I'll let you decide which it is. :-)

suddenly.....

Our church makes a new directory every three years.
Let's see how we've changed over the years......
(sorry for the poor image quality -- these are pictures-of-pictures)

2004
Chris and Stefanie

2007
Chris and Stefanie

2010
Chris, Stefanie, Flora, Scout, & Timber

Yikes! WHERE did all those kids come from!!??!

Flora Nell-- almost-3-years-old
Scout Emerson-- almost-2-years-old
Timber David -- 12-days-old

one step one step one step

We have a children's book called Little One Step. It's about a baby duckling who goes exploring with his brothers and finds himself far from home as dark approaches. He is scared and doesn't want to walk in the dark, but his brothers tell him to keep taking "just one step" and soon he will be home. They tell him not to look ahead at the dark night but to focus on the "one step" in front of him. The little duckling marches all the way home just by continuing to take "one step." I think this is a great book and I could draw a lot of parallels to daily life . . . but I'll just write about what I consider the most useful application of the "one step" method.

Situations often arise in which I am completely overwhelmed. Timber is crying to be fed, Scout is taking his poopy diaper off, and Flora is using a chair to get a box of cereal off the counter . . . . or maybe Scout needs to be disciplined for hitting Flora on the head, Flora needs to be comforted after being hit on the head, and Timber is crying to be fed . . . . or maybe Scout has locked himself in Flora's room, Timber is crying to be fed, and Flora is on the potty yelling for me to come wipe her . . . . or sometimes it's just as simple as all three of them crying to be fed. In any case, I've found that the best thing to do in these situations is to take a deep breath and start "one stepping." Before I know it, I've "one stepped" my way to meeting everyone's needs and enjoying a peaceful house again.

The "one step" method also works great for cleaning. Yes, the thought of cleaning the whole house is daunting, but if I only ask "one step" of myself then usually the one step turns into a mile or two.

I assume the "one step" method works for exercising too, but I haven't tried it yet. I have a hunch that it's going to take more than one step to lose all this baby weight though.....

30 x 30

Inspired by a friend, I have compiled a list of 30 things to do before I turn 30-years-old next October. It took several weeks to put it all together but it is finally finished and ready for viewing! I may add/delete some things in the future -- I had to come up with the list rather quickly and may need to make changes. It's okay though -- I am not letting this be a burden but rather a helpful guide to encourage me to pursue fun, productive, and/or challenging things in the next 10 1/2 months. So.....without further ado......

30 x 30

1. Re-read P&P -- because I read the book in 7th grade and loved it but I think I should average reading it every 15 years, right? Gosh, has it really been so long since 7th grade?
   
2. Dye pink streak in hair -- because I don't have a reason not to do it.
   
3. Teach Flora & Scout to do somersaults -- because everyone else's kids can do somersaults...I'm starting to question this one since I can see black eyes and bruised cheeks as a result of all the flailing legs.
   
4. Lose 20 lbs -- because I no longer have the excuse of being pregnant.
   
5. Learn how to wear eye shadow -- because it intimidates me and 30-year-olds shouldn't be intimidated by eye shadow.
6. Give crochet a try -- because I've always thought I would like it.
   
7. Get caught up on all the pictures that I haven’t printed -- I was doing so well for a while but now I am WAY behind. I don't think I've printed a picture since March. Trying to figure out what to get me for Christmas?? How about a Snapfish gift card or maybe a HUGE photo album??? :-)
   
8. Go to JCP outlet store -- because I drove past it the first month we lived in KC and wanted to go and six years later I've still never been.
   
9. Write down Flora’s and Scout’s birth stories and print all three -- because I will want to remember. They won't care but that's okay.
   
10. Re-read through the New Testament -- because I'm not sure if I've ever read straight through from Matthew to Revelation.
    
11. Organize toy rotation -- because it needs to be done and if it's on the list I'm more likely to do it.
    
12. Repaint hallway -- because the color on the wall right now makes me sick. It looks like cement. Just a shade or two browner would be nice.
    
13. Go back to Nelson-Atkins museum -- because I love that museum and it's been years since I've been. Pre-kids for sure!
    
14. Watch Casablanca -- because I've never seen it and apparently everyone should.
    
15. Successfully give up something for Lent -- because even though obedience is better than sacrifice, sometimes sacrifice is good too.
    
16. Eat at Golden Corral -- because it's kind of an inside joke between Chris and me.
    
17. See Tiffany -- because it's been almost a year since I've seen her and that makes me sad.
    
18. Run a 5k -- because it would make me feel good about myself.
    
19. Get a massage -- because I'll need it after the 5k.
    
20. Complete the 30-Day Shred -- because I've come so close but never finished the whole course. (It's a 30-day DVD workout program)
    
21. Read 6 fiction books & 6 nonfiction books -- because I am sad to say that I don't do much reading anymore.
    
22. Make a new friend -- because my old friends are no good. :-) Just kidding.
    
23. Get baby books up-to-date & add pictures -- because I don't want to try to do this 10 years from now and realize that I don't remember any of the details of their baby days.
    
24. Sew something -- because I probably could if I tried.
    
25. Invite [specific people] over for dinner -- because they are fun people that I want to get to know. I've also taken out their names just in case they read this. Wouldn't it be weird if they thought I was inviting them over just to check it off my list??
    
26. Take each child to a library program for one-on-one time -- because Flora and Scout are not joined at the hip and they each need to have their own adventures occasionally.
    
27. Stay off the computer for 30 (non-consecutive) days -- because I never want to NOT be able to leave the computer off all day. Double negative, I know.....double negatives are so confusing, aren't they?
    
28. Make a “special box” for each kid -- because I still have a special box. Probably no one will get this one but me.....
    
29. Join a playgroup -- because my kids don't have any friends. Ok, not entirely true.....Flora and Scout share three friends......is that enough? It doesn't seem like very many......
    
30. Go to a movie by myself again -- because I've been to three movies by myself and enjoyed those three movie theater experiences more than any other movie theater experiences AND at this point in my life sitting undisturbed for two hours sounds absolutely luxurious!! I just hope I don't fall asleep......
    

So, there you go!! Wish me luck!!

monday's child

Monday's child is fair of face.....or is he??
Poor Timber has had some complexion issues lately but things are starting to clear up! This picture was taken on one of the worst days. I think it's a little bit of baby eczema that I really hope clears up and doesn't stick around for years.

Monday's child is fair of face,

Tuesday's child is full of grace,

Wednesday's child is full of woe,

Thursday's child has far to go,

Friday's child is loving and giving,

Saturday's child works hard for a living,

But the child who is born on the Sabbath Day

Is bonny and blithe and good and gay.

Flora was born on a Friday and Scout was born on a Saturday. Chris was a Sunday baby and I made my appearance on a Thursday. I'm just glad that none of us were Wednesday babies!

duh

Flora: Duh-duh-duh
Me: What letter sounds like duh-duh-duh?
Flora: D!!!
Me: YES! Good job! Can you think of a word that starts with Duh-duh-D?
Flora: CHICKEN!!

since september....

I just changed my desk calendar to November. "Stuck in October?" you ask. Nope -- September. I guess a lot has happened since September, but you'd think I could take 15 seconds to change my calender, right?

********

Tonight Flora and I had an argument while she was in the bath. I told her not to drink the bathwater (YUCK!) and she told me that Jesus drank bathwater. I don't have any scriptural basis for my stance, but I firmly argued against her claim. Secretly, though, I wondered if he WOULD drink the bathwater -- assuming, of course, that he had turned it to wine first.

********

As some of you may know, we had to replace a pipe that runs through our front yard today.
BEST. DAY. EVER. if you are an almost-2-year-old boy!!




As you can see, Scout was mesmerized! Since it was so early in the morning, I wonder if he thought he was still dreaming?? Well, good ol' Mom has the pictures to prove it was real. We also still have a huge hole in our yard to prove it was real, but that should get taken care of in a day or two when the inspector approves the work.

********

Get ready for Christmas pics!!! Since we will begin our Christmas travels in mid-December we've decided to put the Christmas tree up early this year! I'm thinking maybe next weekend so we can have a full month at the house with the tree up. I love Christmas time! The colors, the sounds, the smells, the tastes.......I don't know if I have any Christmasy touch associations, but I'll think about that and let you know. Stay tuned!!

imagine her surprise.....

Flora forgot to put her Dora potty seat on the toilet . . . and she fell in the toilet. That's funny stuff right there!

peas & carrots too?

We bought Flora a Dora pinata for her birthday. She has a Dora book in which one of the characters has a surprise party with a pinata so we knew she'd love it. She did! And Scout did too! And I have proof! Kind of . . . I meant to record the moment that the pinata broke open but it turns out that I had my camera set to take a photograph instead of video. Bummer. I do have a cute video of the immediate aftermath though. You can see how excited they are! Scout is especially excited about the suckers!



Dora the Pinata has been a guest in our house since Flora's birthday but I finally had to throw her in the trash last night. Her face was gone, along with one arm and most of her clothing. She was basically just a Dora-shaped piece of cardboard. Of course, Flora asked where her Dora pinata was today and I had to tell her that Dora was gone. I promised that we would get another pinata for Scout's birthday. They both thought that was a grand idea and asked if there would be treats inside. I told them that there would definitely be treats in the new pinata. Flora's eyes lit up and she said, "Mommy, maybe there will be chocolate or even celery!!"
Uh, yeah . . . maybe even celery.

blogging + thinking = blinking? thogging?

So I've been thinking.....

I am absolutely horrible at expressing myself verbally. I usually rely on odd noises and elaborate hand gestures to communicate my message as words generally fail me. It's not that I don't know any words, it's just hard to express what I am thinking because I don't think in words. Do you? I don't know if other people think in words or not but I think in pictures and ideas and feelings and, as we all know, sometimes it's hard to put pictures/ideas/feelings into words. Then again, maybe everyone thinks this way and I am the only one who has problems translating these thoughts into coherent sentences. Regardless, I find that I can "think" better by writing. Often I am not sure what I am thinking until I start writing about it. Perhaps that is why I was horrible at writing outlines when I was in school. How can I outline what I am going to write before I write it? I turned in the outline assignments, but my finished product never looked anything like my outline said it would. And writing is so much easier than talking. I can take long pauses to choose just the right word or delete whole sentences that don't make sense without anyone ever knowing. These habits are extremely awkward when practiced in verbal conversations.

Whew---all that just to say that this blog is about me writing out some thoughts that I've been wanting to explore.

So I've been thinking....

I've been thinking that the way Flora, Scout, and Timber act toward me is very similar to the way that Christians act toward God at different times. (Mother--this idea is similar to your theory, but also very different) Let's explore....

And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 18:3-4

Timber is so little and so helpless. He cries when he needs something and is absolutely dependent on me to meet that need. I, of course, take care of him the best that I can because I love him and he is mine. And the best part about Timber? He absolutely adores me. I am his favorite person in the world. He could be deliriously happy just staring at me for hours. When Jesus said that we should come as little children, I think he meant really really little children, like Timber. The older we get, the more 'human' we become....

Side Note: Does it sound like I am comparing myself to God? Well, I guess it does, but obviously I am not God. I love my kids but my love is not perfect and I am not perfect. God's is and He is. Just wanted to clear the air -- I do NOT think that I am God.

Scout is almost 2-years-old. The phrase that I hear from him most often during the day is "all by myself!" He is absolutely determined to be independent . . . or as independent as an almost-2-year-old can possibly be. He's not being rebellious and it's not that he doesn't love me or enjoy my company -- he's just trying to conquer his little world on his own now. Most of the time, I will let him do things "all by myself" although it always takes much longer and considerably more effort than if he had just let me help him. And sometimes he fails.
Also, Scout will sometimes scream and cry if he doesn't get his way. Again, it's not quite rebellion yet but a result of the fact that he doesn't understand why he can't have/do what he wants. I always have a good reason but his little brain just can't understand the reason. He can't see the big picture like I can, but he wants to be in control nevertheless.

Flora is 3-years-old and is learning the not-so-fine art of rebellion. She can look me right in the eye and say, "NO!" when I give her a command. Yes, she loves me and usually wants to please me, but she has also discovered that she has a will of her own. Oh, how easy it would be if her will always matched my will!! But, alas, 3-year-olds are not quite grown-ups yet, so Flora's will usually includes more candy and hitting than it should and not nearly enough obeying. So I have to discipline her and that's no fun for her OR me. Sometimes it even means that I can't do a fun activity that I had planned for us. It's frustrating because if she would just obey then we could all have a great time but her disobedience means that I have to withhold good things from her.

Timber, Scout, and Flora are all acting exactly how they are supposed to act for their respective ages, but I was thinking that my attitude toward God is sometimes more like a 2- or 3-year-old's attitude than it should be. I often look at Timber's peaceful sleeping face when I'm holding him and wish that someone could hold me and make the whole world seem right. I guess I forget that God IS holding me and I really should be completely at peace. I also forget sometimes that I don't have to do it "all by myself" and I really shouldn't even try. God sees the big picture. Even when I don't understand or don't want to obey I need to remember that He really does love me and wants only the best for me. Just like I know what's best for my kids (or at least I know better than they do!), God knows what is best for me.

So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him. Matthew 7:11

I'm not always a Timber or a Flora or a Scout, but I can think of specific instances in which I have been each, as I'm sure most Christians can. It's not a perfect analogy though . . . right now Timber is gassy, Scout is teething , and Flora is having a conversation with a corn dog. I am happy to report that I am neither a Timber, a Scout, nor a Flora at this particular moment.

let it roll

I think I'm starting to get the hang of this Mommy-of-three thing. The key to keeping my sanity was admitting that Flora and Scout do not need to be micromanaged quite as much as I thought they did. And yes, that is just a nicer way of saying that they don't need me as much as I thought they did. Well, obviously they still need me, but they don't need me to follow them around to make sure they don't eat glue or fall down the stairs. They are past the glue-eating phase . . . and on to slightly less dangerous mischief.

I've learned to "let it roll," meaning to let unimportant issues roll off my back like water rolls off a duck's back. Sorry I had to explain that but I used that phrase a few days ago and the person I was talking to had no idea what it meant to "let it roll." But anyway....

Letting it roll means not caring that Flora's room is ALWAYS a disastrous mess.

It means being okay with the fact that Scout never actually falls asleep in his bed.

Flora runs around in her panties half the time and there are stickers all over my walls and it doesn't really bother me. I am also undisturbed by the fact that Flora once used her walls as a canvas during naptime. I'm sure Mr. Clean will erase all this crayon, but I'm not really in any hurry to do it.

Flora and Scout emptied all their dresser drawers and lined them up in the hallway to create "steps" and I just let it happen. It was one of those things that wasn't really dangerous and they were having so much fun playing and working together that I didn't see any reason to intervene.

I try to keep the house somewhat clean but most days it is a disaster until Flora and Scout go to bed and I pick up all the toys. However, last week Flora decided that she was going to clean up the living room for me. Maybe she was tired of me letting things go! She and Scout worked together to pick up all the toys and couch pillows and got the room looking really great. Then they cleaned Scout's room together and then cleaned Flora's room too! I was silent and stayed out of their way while they were working. I definitely didn't want to break up THAT party! After they were all finished I asked Flora why she decided to clean. She smiled a big smile and said, "Because it make you SO happy, Mommy!"
Oh, how sweet!!! Of course, then she asked if she could watch a Dora, probably KNOWING that I couldn't possibly say no after all the work she had done for me . . . and I couldn't, but why would I? I am absolutely willing to negotiate if she wants to trade an hour of cleaning for 20 minutes of Dora. I can definitely let a few extra episodes of Dora roll off my conscience!!

hide-and-seek --- the preschool version

Q: When does Hide-and-Seek become a spectator sport?
A: When it is being played by a barely-3-year-old and an almost-2-year-old!

So, the other day Scout decides he wants to play Hide-and-Seek. He informs Flora of his fun idea by running and jumping in circles, shouting, "Hide-and-Seek! Hide-and-Seek!" at the top of his lungs. Flora is obviously drawn in -- I mean, who can resist that kind of persuasion? I, too, am excited. There is actually very little hiding or seeking that takes place when Flora and Scout play Hide-and-Seek but it is certainly amusing to watch!

Flora tells Scout to hide and starts counting to ten in the hallway.
Scout runs up behind her and shouts, "Here I am!" and she stops counting and says, "I found you, Scout!" Then they both giggle and jump around a bit before Flora announced that it is her turn to hide.
She tells Scout to go to her room and count, which he obediently does. Flora finds a good hiding spot (behind the couch) and shouts, "Come find me, Scout!"
Scout yells, "Oh-tay!" and runs into the living room. He looks around for Flora for a minute but can't find her.
Eventually, Flora pops her head out of her hiding spot and asks, "You find me yet, Scout?"
"No," Scout says (while looking right at her).
"Oh, okay," says Flora, and she goes back to hiding.
Scout looks around some more and then find Flora behind the couch. They both burst into giggles and it's Scout's turn to hide again.

What fun!

why timber?

The short answer is "I don't know. Timber was just the right name."

And now the long answer: It was originally suggested as a nickname for the baby before we knew the sex. He/she could be called Tember because I was due in SepTEMBER. I liked the sound of it although I preferred the spelling and woodsy feel of Timber. Timber went on the list along with many many other names. I was amused at the interest that so many people took in what we were going to name our baby. I wish I would have kept track of how many name suggestions we got, but I know that there had to have been at least a couple hundred suggested by email, facebook, text, mail(!!!), or verbally.

Chris and I both liked Timber but had some reservations about the name. The obvious drawback to the name Timber is all the "timmmmmberrrrrr" comments. I assume that those will subside as people begin to associate "Timber" with Timber and not "timmmmberrrrr." ---although I fully expect to hear and use "timmmmberrrrr" often while he's learning to walk! Our other concern was that it could be a girl's name too. The few baby name books that listed the name Timber had it in either the boy name section or in both sections, so we didn't think it would be an issue. Also, Scout is most often listed as a girl's name and that didn't stop us from using it!!

Another favorite of ours was Copper. I still really like that name and Timber might have been named Copper if we hadn't decided that we wanted his middle name to be David (Chris' middle name). I just thought Copper David sounded like a weird reference to David Copperfield.

In the end, we just felt like Timber was the right name. I'm not a big fan of the name Tim, but if he doesn't want to be Timber when he's older he could always shorten it to Tim. Maybe. I might find ways to thwart his efforts to be taken more seriously. I've heard people say that you should imagine your child's name as the President of the United States (I assume people say that to deter people from choosing unusual names???) but I think the best thing for the child might be to give him a name that basically guarantees he will NEVER be the President of the United States. Do any parents REALLY wish that job upon their child? I certainly don't. I hope that Scout and Timber have fun, outside-the-box lives that live up to their names. I'm fairly certain that they will grow up to be a lot like their Daddy and I think he could definitely pull off a name like Scout or Timber. In the end, Scout is Scout and Timber is Timber and people who know them will think the names fit perfectly. And people who don't know them really shouldn't have an opinion anyway. :-)

the family that poops together.....

I don't want to complain a lot about the challenges of having three young children but some things need to be shared. If nothing else, I will remember this post next time this particular challenge arises and laugh to myself instead of screaming to myself.

One of the most frustrating parts of my day is Flora's potty time . . . her poopy potty time to be specific. She likes to get the most out of her poopy potty time. She KNOWS that she has my attention (I can't say that it's undivided attention but at least MOST of my attention is focused on her) and she draws the process out as long as possible. If she were my only child I wouldn't mind whiling away the hours in the bathroom with her, but it's not exactly the mother-daughter bonding experience that she might want it to be. Here's how the scenario usually plays out:

Flora runs to the bathroom shouting, "I'm goin' poo-poo, Mommy!" with Scout running behind her shouting, "Poo-poo, Mommy!" Invariably, I am in the middle of feeding Timber so I haul the two of us off the chair and hurry to the bathroom to supervise and assist. Flora gets herself onto the potty with minimal, if any, help from me and begins her task. Meanwhile, Scout throws toys into the bathtub, pulls the toilet paper off the roll, shuts the door and turns off the light, attempts to wipe Flora, sticks his hands into the extra potty chair, crawls between my legs over and over, and generally wreaks havoc the entire time we are in the bathroom. Occasionally I am Mean Mommy and shut him out of the bathroom but then he just gets his little feelings hurt, so usually it's all four of us in the bathroom waiting on Flora to finish pooping. The really frustrating thing is that she is usually finished within a minute or two of sitting on the potty, but she just enjoys the situation so much that she insists she's not done yet and won't let me wipe her. So, Flora is blissfully seated on her throne (haha--couldn't resist), Scout is getting into everything, I am trying to corral Scout with one-hand and convince Flora she is done (although bribery is always more effective than verbal persuasion), and Timber is finishing his meal, completely oblivious to the chaos. Also, I won't bore you with the details, but I will just say that washing hands while nursing is difficult. I should probably just start putting Timber down and letting him cry until we are done. Now that I think about it, the bathroom isn't the nicest place to have a meal, is it?

Can you understand why I dread this ten minutes of the day more than any other part? I can only imagine what will happen when Scout starts potty training. I may just send him and Flora into the bathroom together with a stack of flushable wipes and hope for the best.

silly shorts

**Flora and Scout were in the other room when Timber started fussing. I heard Flora say, "Hurry, Scout, come on! Our new baby needs us!" They both ran into the room and gave Timber kisses.

**Grandpa and Granny (aka Jay and Debbie, aka Chris' parents) visited last weekend to meet Timber. As Debbie was holding Timber for the first time, she asked me what Scout thought of his new brother. I replied, "Oh, he just loves him. He likes to give him kisses." Immediately after the words left my mouth, Scout hurled a ball across the room directly at Timber's head. I'm sure Timber will pay him back for that someday.

**Timber was hungry but I was attending to Scout's needs before feeding him. Scout heard Timber crying and told me, "Mommy, our new baby is grumpy."

**Scout ripped Flora's princess birthday card and she was quite upset about it. She found two Phillips screwdrivers and brought them to Chris with her princess card and told him to fix it.

**Scout crawled out of his crib a couple weeks ago, so as soon as all of our out of town guests left we began Operation Bed Swap. Scout got Flora's toddler bed, Flora got our bed, and we got the guest bed. Timber will get Scout's crib when he's ready for it. After her first night on a "big bed" I asked Flora what she thought about it. She replied, "It was cool."

**Timber is still Our New Baby to Flora and Scout. They use the phrase as if it was actually his name, like, "Open your eyes, Our New Baby!" or "Our New Baby, you need to wake up!"

**Flora was wide-eyed and curious the first time she saw me nursing Timber. Obviously a little confused, she asked me incredulously, "Mommy, our new baby eats belly buttons?!?"

**I got out our trusty ol' swing for Timber to use, but hadn't replaced the dead batteries yet. As it turns out, I don't need to replace the batteries! I've got two excellent little swing-pushers in Flora and Scout. Scout occasionally gets a little carried away and I have to remind him to push gently, but most of the time they do their job very well. Since Timber has never experienced the rhythmic back-and-forth motion of a battery-operated swing he really doesn't mind that his swinging is a little more, um, sporadic.

**Flora and Scout are in Flora's room tearing paper into shreds and creating a huge mess. I am letting it happen because I discovered that I can easily type on Chris' laptop if I slouch on the couch with Timber asleep on my chest! Woohoo! I can blog again! And blog I will . . . I've been composing blogs in my head for weeks!!

the birth story

**ATTENTION**

Just in case the title didn't make it clear, this is Timber's BIRTH story. It's not graphic in my opinion, but there IS a chance that the words "cervix" or "placenta" will be used (actually, probably not "placenta" -- I can't imagine what I would have to say about that). If these words or the topic of birth in general disturb you then stop reading. Also, this is a very long post . . . but not as long as my labor so no complaining!! There -- now you've been given fair warning. Proceed at your own risk!

It was a dark and stormy night . . . but that doesn't have anything to do with the birth story because, despite my high hopes, Timber wasn't born on that night. He wasn't born the night after that either. In fact, we had to wait three more nights after that dark and stormy night before our little guy decided he was finally ready to meet the world.

I was due on Sunday, September 19th and became more and more grumpy as the 19th wore on and I realized that there would be no baby that day. I was not anticipating being overdue with baby number three! In fact, I was completely convinced that I would have him at least a week early. Obviously, he had other ideas . . . but I guess it's HIS big entrance into the world and he should be able to choose when he makes it.

I woke up at 4am on Monday, September 20th having contractions. They weren't strong but they were every six minutes apart. The doctor had advised me to come into the hospital when contractions were seven to ten minutes apart since this was my third baby, so I was immediately confused at how to proceed since I went from no contractions to contractions every six minutes. However, I knew they weren't strong enough to head to the hospital yet so I got out of bed, put the clean dishes away, and then wandered around the house for a bit before getting bored enough to head back to bed. When they didn't stop for several hours and started coming every four to five minutes apart I knew that today was probably the day -- although I was still confused because they just weren't very strong. We got the kids up and dressed, I called Mother and took a quick shower, and we headed to Stephanie's house to drop off the kids.

Days earlier I had googled "how long does a third labor usually last" and was startled to find a familiar thread through all the relevant hits google returned: "The first labor is long, the second labor is easy, and the third labor is unpredictable." This was the wisdom being shared around the internet. I chose to ignore this information and stubbornly believed that this third labor would be half as long as my second labor. My plan was to get to the hospital and have my baby boy delivered within an hour or two of being admitted. My plan was WAY off . . .

When we arrived at the hospital, I had been having contractions for six hours and they had been consistently four minutes apart for an hour or so. They took me to an assessment room and checked my cervix and I was only at TWO centimeters!! "Two?!?" I asked the nurse in disbelief, "that's no good!!" They left me in the room for an hour to see if there was any progression. After an hour I was two and a half centimeters so they gave me the option of being admitted right away or walking around for a while to try to speed up labor. I chose to walk, so Chris and I began pacing the halls of the labor and delivery wing. We walked and walked and passed the time by texting Stephanie about the kids. After an hour I was almost five centimeters so I got my IV and wristbands and was escorted to my labor and delivery room. They hooked me up to the fetal monitor and various other machines and asked if I was ready for drugs. I opted for a dose of Stadol (sp?) which did absolutely nothing. Well, not nothing . . . it made me slur my words and allowed me to fall asleep for a few minutes between each contraction, but it did absolutely nothing for the pain. Basically, for about an hour I was transformed from woman-in-labor to drunk-woman-in-labor. Lovely. To emphasize how ineffective Stadol is, I will insert a short side story here -- As I was pushing, the nurse (probably to encourage me to keep going) told the doctors that I was doing this all with no medication/pain relief. I managed to mumble something about the Stadol and she waved off my comment and replied, "Oh, that stuff doesn't do anything and it wore off hours ago." I remember wondering why they even offer it if it doesn't help. Perhaps they find the slurred ramblings of laboring women on Stadol amusing??

It was about this time that Mother showed up and Chris said my blood pressure shot up. Ha! I was glad she was there so I don't think there was a connection between the two . . . but it was a funny observation! She arrived at the hospital at 3:30pm and things were starting to get intense. Note that it has been almost twelve hours since contractions started. According to MY plan, I should already be settled into my recovery room, perhaps contemplating a nap with my sweet little sleeping baby. But no . . . instead I was counting slowly to ten, reciting my multiplication tables, saying the alphabet backwards, and repeating the Lord's Prayer in an effort to take my mind off the painful contractions and stay somewhat sane. Of course, I was doing all these things silently in my head -- I didn't want the nurse (or Chris and Mother) to think I had completely lost it! It was also about this time that they noticed Timber's heart rate was dropping during contractions, so they gave me an oxygen mask and instructed me to lie on my right side only. From that point on, I irrationally thought that the contractions would be so much easier to handle if I could only turn to my left side. Also, Chris said I was a little bit psycho with my oxygen mask and would not let it slip away from my mouth/nose even the slightest bit. I probably just liked having something that I could control. I think the nurse eventually pried the oxygen mask from my hands during the pushing process. Otherwise, I might have still had the mask on in all the mom-with-brand-new-baby photos!!

If I had known ahead of time how long this labor would be and how big Timber was going to be I might have opted for the epidural. I didn't have an epidural with Scout because it was too late for one by the time we got to the hospital. Three hours after checking in, Scout was born. He was 6lbs 11oz and his head circumference was so small it didn't even make it onto the growth curve chart (don't worry, it's "average" now!). Needless to say, delivering an 8lb 11oz baby after almost eight hours at the hospital was a completely different experience. Why no epidural?? After reading lots of books and even watching a documentary on the hospital birth experience I was convinced that epidural = pitocin = c-section. I know this isn't always the case (I had an epidural and pitocin with Flora and no c-section), but studies have shown that one medical intervention often leads to the next in a snowball effect. Basically, once the doctors start "helping" you it is hard to get them to stop! Obstetricians are trained surgeons and many are more comfortable with performing a "safe" c-section than they are with letting the birth process happen naturally. Obviously, that is a general statement and there are many OBs who encourage drug-free childbirth, but in my opinion, the best way to have Timber was without an epidural. But they are very nice and I realize that what was best for me is not best for everyone, so I'll get off my soapbox now!! :-)

Overall, I think I was a very nice laboring woman. I only asked Chris to stop touching me once (and possibly Mother too???) and I think I was very polite about it. He did the one thing I had requested of him ahead of time -- he fed me ice chips. Other than helping me stay cool, there really wasn't much that anyone could do to help. Labor really is a good word for it, although it's really more of an internal struggle with the pain than actual physical labor. I'm glad I did it without the epidural though -- it's probably the coolest thing I'll ever do -- which is why I'm okay with bragging about it just a little bit. :-) "What a woman!" my nurse said in encouragement as I was pushing (Chris and I laughed at that later). She was very encouraging, but I was more encouraged by what Chris was saying to me. He was reminding me that I would never have to do this again! Now THAT's encouragement!!

Finally, after 13 hours and 40 minutes of labor (but thankfully only 20 minutes of pushing), Timber David Borkert made his appearance. The first words little Timber heard his Mommy say were, "Oh, I'm so glad that's over!!" At 8lbs 11oz, Timber was much bigger than 7lb 5oz Flora or 6lb 11oz Scout. He is a big boy and he just keeps growing! We are so happy to have Timber and feel that he really completes our family. He is such an easy baby -- he eats well, sleeps well, and only cries when he's trying to make a poopy (which I'm confident he'll outgrow eventually!).

Hooray for Timber! Hooray for babies! Hooray for not having any more babies!! :-)