postpartum

I desperately need to clip my nails and pluck my eyebrows but I cannot imagine when I will ever have time to take care of these issues. Do you have any idea how time-consuming a newborn is?? They sleep CONSTANTLY and the only thing you can really do with a sleeping newborn is stare at him, so there goes 20 hours of my day. Then, if he's not sleeping he's either eating or pooping which both require me to play an active role. So, basically, my day is completely full . . . and I'm still supposed to fit in time to turn on Dora and open up a Lunchable for the non-newborns in the house. Unfortunately, that is what my parenting skills have been reduced to in this postpartum period. It's okay though -- I'll get this Mommy-of-three thing figured out, but I'm not in any hurry to reach supermom status. We'll all just take it easy for a few weeks and get to know our new baby. Eventually, I'll be motivated to reintroduce healthy habits like brushing teeth and eating vegetables and not watching tv all day, but I'm also convinced that a stressed-out Mommy would be more detrimental to everyone's health than a cavity or two. Although I really don't want to deal with cavities . . . maybe we will resume brushing teeth next week.

it's over!

I started a blog while we were still at the hospital but never finished it because they brought Timber back from his circumcision sooner than I expected (and let's face it -- staring at a sleeping newborn is WAY more exciting than blogging). So here are my very brief thoughts following the birth of our third baby:

"It's over! I can't believe it's finally over!" I don't know how many times I've repeated that phrase to Chris in the past two days. I am just so relieved and so thankful that we have three healthy babies and I was able to have three uncomplicated pregnancies and births. And I'm also thankful that I will never have to do any of it again!!!

my due date

Today is my due date. I know and you know that only 5% of babies are born on their due dates, but I was REALLY hoping that this baby would arrive on the early side of the due date rather than the late side. It's official now, though, this baby will NOT be early. He'll either defy the odds and be extremely punctual or be late. Since today is half over already, I'm guessing we have a late arrival coming.

My clothing situation is getting desperate. I only own three shirts that still cover my belly -- two pink and one blue. I'm getting really tired of wearing them. Also, I only wear them when I leave the house so if you stop by unexpectedly please be polite enough to avoid staring at the bit o' belly hanging out from under my shirt.

So, how should I celebrate this momentous day? Well, this morning I woke up earlier than usual with Scout, fed the kids breakfast and got them dressed, and then sent them off to church with Chris. Once they were all gone, I went back to sleep for a couple of hours and then indulged in all the Fruity Pebbles I wanted to eat. I say indulged because eating Fruity Pebbles usually means SHARING Fruity Pebbles with the two little mouths that constantly hover over my bowl. It just felt indulgent to eat Fruity Pebbles all by myself.

I had intended to clean and organize Flora's closet while everyone was gone, but now it is almost noon and they'll all be home soon. I suppose I should start thinking about what they will eat for lunch once they arrive. I'm REALLY looking forward to my mom being here for a while -- I think I will put her entirely responsible for feeding Flora and Scout. It's probably my least favorite Mommy-duty.

Today is also FOOTBALL DAY though, so that should keep my mind off all the contractions that I'm not having.

i jump, you jump, we all jump for IHOP

It was a bit disappointing to wake up this morning and realize that I had not gone into labor last night. Jeff Claunch predicted that contractions would start at 4:30am and the baby would be born by afternoon, but he was wrong. He had me convinced though -- I woke up at EXACTLY 4:30am and then couldn't go back to sleep for over an hour as I waited for the contractions to begin!! Thanks a lot, Jeff. :-)

So, since I wasn't in labor we really didn't have anything to do today. We all had a very lazy morning and then Chris suggested going to IHOP for lunch. I have been wanting to go to IHOP for months now. I even suggested it as our anniversary dinner but he shot that one down. Sometimes their Quick Two-Egg Breakfast is the most perfect meal. It's really nothing special, but when I start craving it, it's hard to get it off my mind. Needless to say, I was ecstatic at Chris' suggestion!

The four of us (well, FIVE of us) filed into IHOP -- 1-year-old, 2-year-old, Daddy, and VERY pregnant Mommy -- and were immediately greeted by one of the three hostess on duty. As she was walking us to our table, I overheard one of the other hostesses ask her co-worker, "Hey, have you ever watched that 19 Kids and Counting show?" It made me laugh because I knew exactly what, or rather WHO, had reminded her of that show. I feel the need to clear up any confusion now. Yes, we will have had three kids in three years, but NO, we are NOT the Duggars!! We're planning this to be our last baby, not baby number 3 of 20! "Borkert, party of five," sounds just right to me.

IHOP was delicious and the kids were very well-behaved and ate most of their food. After we had been there a while, Flora asked me, "Mommy, we are at I JUMP?" Now, THAT's funny!! We had been telling her we were eating at IHOP and I guess she forgot the name but she definitely remembered the idea! IHOP, IJUMP -- same thing, right!?? :-)

After IHOP we walked across the parking lot to Lowes and spent an hour browsing. I hadn't realized how magical a place like Lowes would be to a 1-year-old and a 2-year-old. They were fascinated by all the toilets, played peek-a-boo through the windows on display, rode a lawn mower, peeked inside the refrigerators, checked the mail boxes for mail, and ooh-ed and aah-ed over the aisle of bright light fixtures.

Fun times, fun times . . . now if only this baby would make an appearance we could call this a stellar day!

(eviction notice)

Dear Baby --

The floors are swept, the rugs are clean, bedrooms and bathrooms are picked up, dishes are put away, laundry is done, groceries are bought, bills are paid, cars are full of gas, fantasy football lineups are set, my phone is charged, the camera battery is charged, and the lawn is mowed . . . I think it's time. I really appreciate you hanging out in-utero long enough for me to get my to-do list done, but if you don't come quickly my to-do list will become a to-redo list.

Flora and Scout are excited to meet you and you will have so much fun watching their little faces as you hear their little voices. I know you've been hearing their voices for a while now, but I promise the whining and crying and yelling is much easier to tolerate when you see how cute they look while they're doing it. Also, when you are a "real" baby and not just "the baby in Mommy's tummy" I will be able to enforce the no-sitting-on-your-baby-brother rule. As uncomfortable as it must be for you to have a toddler sitting on your bum, it is actually much MORE uncomfortable for ME to have a toddler sitting on your bum.

Daddy and I are excited to meet you too. We have a little bed for you in our room and the car seat is ready and waiting. Waiting . . . for YOU. We even bought some sparkling peach juice today to celebrate your arrival. It looks yummy and I really want to try it soon, so maybe you could hurry up just a bit?

If it's the name thing that's giving you some hesitation, then don't worry about that. Your Daddy and I have been through this with your sister and it all worked out just fine. We've talked about a LOT of names in the past couple of weeks and there are many that we like, so I'm sure we'll be able to choose the right one when we meet you. However, we DO need to MEET YOU before we will know what to name you, so . . . yeah . . . let's get this party started.

Looking forward to meeting you in person. It's hard to get to know someone when they are living inside your uterus.

Love,
Mommy

a busy morning . . . and something to ponder

Sometimes we have playdates at Jack's house on Thursday mornings. Jack's house is also where Flora and Scout may spend a short bit of time when Chris and I head to the hospital to have this baby. The plan is for my mom to drive up to KC as soon as possible, but since this is my 3rd delivery, I'm assuming that I won't be able to wait around for 4 hours for her to arrive before heading to the hospital. Also, I don't expect her to jump in the car if I call her at 3:30am . . . That is where our good friend, Stephanie (Jack's mom), has graciously offered to step in and help. She will watch Flora and Scout until Mother can get here to take over. Since I don't want them to be completely confused by what is happening, I've been talking to Flora and Scout about how they might go to Jack's house "while Mommy and Daddy go to the hospital to get our new baby."

We haven't had a playdate at Jack's house in a while but thought we were going to go today. Flora asked where we were going when I pulled out clothes and shoes for her to wear and I told her we were going to Jack's house. She got a really excited look on her face and asked, "And you and Daddy will go get our new baby at the hospital?!?!" It was so cute! I had to disappoint her by telling her that it wasn't time to get the new baby yet, but that it would be very very soon. "Maybe in one or two or three days," I said (hopefully). "Ok," Flora replied, "but our baby is probably getting really really hungry. He needs to come out of your belly so we can give him some food to eat. Maybe some yogurt."

We didn't end up going to Jack's house at all because Jack had an eye doctor appointment so we went to browse around Target instead. Flora wanted to walk and promised that she wouldn't run away, so I agreed. She was so good! She stayed close and although she often stopped to look at or touch things she would always come when she was called to catch up. She didn't even ask for anything. I was pretty proud of her.

Scout, on the other hand, threw a monster tantrum in Target over a little firetruck. It was a cute truck and didn't cost much so I might have bought it for him if he hadn't thrown such a fit about it. Scout very rarely cries like that. He's usually so laid-back and easy-going that I was a bit shocked at the top-of-his-lungs screams he was producing! Luckily, Thursday morning is a pretty slow time for Target, so we didn't disturb too many customers.

Scout's Target tantrum made me think of how we are with God sometimes. If he had been willing to put the firetruck back on the shelf when I asked him to, then I might have gone back for it later because I really did want him to have it. He couldn't let go of it though, so I couldn't give it to him. How many times has God denied us things because we aren't willing to let go of them? Or maybe just not willing to let go of wanting them? I don't know . . . just a thought that occurred to me while writing about Scout's tantrum so I don't really have any developed thoughts to offer on the subject yet . . . but it's something to ponder. :-)

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I obsessed these days and my pregnancy books say hormones are to blame. Hormones are also to blame for what Chris and I have been calling my "pregnancy brain." I am so forgetful and absentminded! If this is what the 3rd pregnancy does to a person, then I seriously wonder about the mental state of people who have 10, 12, or 19 kids! :-)

Here are some examples of my pregnancy brain moments:

After 6 years of using the same shower, I turned the knob the wrong way and got colder water instead of hotter water.

I changed the sheets on Flora's bed after doing laundry and then immediately began looking for the clean sheets to put on her bed. I searched her room, searched the rest of the house, and even asked the kids if they had hidden them somewhere. I finally returned to Flora's room to begin my search again and saw the freshly washed sheets already on her bed.

I accused Chris of forgetting to turn the oven off after taking the waffle fries out. He informed me that I was the one who had taken the fries out of the oven. Also on waffle fry night, I pulled the fries out of the oven, flipped them over, and asked Chris how long I needed to put them back into the oven. He told me 12 minutes and then gave me a funny look and said, "You know you just asked me that a minute ago, right?" No, I didn't know I had asked him that. I didn't remember asking the question or hearing the answer the first time.

On a trip to Deanna Rose Children's Farmstead, I realized that I had not buckled Flora into her carseat! I had to pull over on the Interstate to buckle her after we had already been traveling for 15 minutes.

I purchased a HUGE bottle of lotion in a scent that I loved only to discover at home that it wasn't lotion, but hair conditioner. I'm glad my hair smells nice, but I really wish I could find some lotion that smells so good!

Overall, I think I'm doing okay. The kids get fed every day and I haven't forgotten to pay any bills yet. I'm hoping that some of my brain function returns after delivery, but my mom-friends warn me that it won't. I guess that's just more support for our decision that there will be no B4.

take a number

The family is picking dates for this baby to be born on facebook. Here's the breakdown:

Sept 12th - Chris
Sept 14th - Stefanie
Sept 15th - Linn and Flora
Sept 16th - Sara
Sept 17th - Gayla and Sandy and Treva
Sept 18th - Janna
"Sunday" - Shane

I'm not sure what the prize is, but I guess I am the ultimate winner! No one is predicting this baby to be overdue and I appreciate that! :-)

light

Only 5% of babies are born on their due dates. Isn't it amazing that the date that you repeat over and over to people as being "the day" really doesn't have much chance of being "the day" at all? Doctors like to talk about a due window instead of a due date. This due window begins at 37 weeks and lasts through 42 weeks. It's basically the three weeks BEFORE your due date that they will not attempt to stop labor if it starts though the two weeks AFTER your due date that they consider it safe for you to continue carrying your baby. At 39 1/2 weeks today, I am right smack in the middle of my due window. So, really, any time now would be good.

But anyway......
Flora can turn on her light now. I have mixed feelings about this new skill. It is nice that she can wake up in the mornings and turn on her light and play for a while instead of yelling for us to come turn on her light, BUT she also gets out of bed and turns on her light at bedtime and naptime. At naptime, I usually just let her play in her room with the light on until she eventually crashes somewhere on her floor. Unfortunately, she doesn't ALWAYS end up crashing. At bedtime, I put her to bed and then go back into her room three or four times to turn off the light before she finally falls asleep. Last night, her light was off and she was asleep when I went to bed at 1am, but when I woke up at 4am I saw a sliver of light coming out of her room! Did she have an early-morning tea party in her room? Or did she just wake up, turn on her light, and immediately crawl back into bed? I guess I'll never know, but at least she was sleeping when I quietly opened her door and turned off the light.

This has all started in the last week and has resulted in a very grumpy, sleep-deprived almost-3-year-old. I know some kids are ready to give up naps at her age, but she definitely still needs that extra sleep. She didn't nap yesterday, didn't settle into bed until after 10pm last night, and woke up earlier than usual this morning, so I'm anticipating a rough day. Just a few minutes ago she had a complete meltdown in the hallway because I gave her the wrong shirt to wear. She wanted "the green shirt with flowers, NOT the green shirt with the butterfly!!!!" Oh my, how could I have made such a HUGE mistake? Chris thinks we should just take her light bulb out and I am getting close to agreeing with him!

I'm hoping that Flora will take a good nap today and go to bed at a decent hour so that she will be magically transformed back into my sweet little girl tomorrow.

watermelon tongue scissors

It has become increasingly difficult to rock and sing to Flora at night due to my watermelon-sized belly. She often shifts around, trying to find a comfortable position and almost always winds up basically sitting on top of my belly with her arms around my neck and her head on my shoulder. Obviously, sitting on top of her brother will be a no-no when he is no longer in the womb, but for now this seems to be the most comfortable position for all of us. A few nights ago, the baby was especially active as I was rocking Flora. After a few minutes, she said, "Mommy, something keeps kicking my belly!" I told her it was our new baby in my belly that was kicking her. "Oh," she said, "and we need to get our new baby a toothbrush." I'm not sure where the sudden concern for his dental health came from, but I assured Flora that when he was old enough to have teeth we would definitely get him a toothbrush.

I realize that one of my duties as "Mommy" is to kiss boo-boos and make them all better. I've been kissing Flora's boo-boos for a while now and Scout has finally caught on to the game. I'm not sure he realizes it's a game though . . . he's actually VERY serious about getting any and all boo-boos kissed, whether they actually hurt or not. Sometimes he'll fall, run to me for a quick kiss on his arm or leg, and then run back to playing. Obviously, I don't mind kissing boo-boos. It's actually one of the perks of my job usually. However, we had an interesting situation arise today when Scout fell and bit his tongue. He dutifully came to see me on the couch with his tongue pushed out of his mouth. I tried air-kisses and kisses on his cheek instead, but he was very focused on getting his tongue kissed. Chris laughed as he watched Scout intently grab both sides of my face with his little hands and press his tongue on my face (I don't think he actually got my mouth as I was trying every evasive maneuver I could think of to avoid it!!). I could have just left it at that, but Chris was just laughing too hard, so I asked Scout if he needed Daddy to kiss it too . . . then it was MY turn to laugh as I watched Scout come at Chris with his tongue sticking out!!

Flora is a good big sister. As she and Scout were getting their toy bracelets out of the kitchen drawer, I heard her tell him, "No, Scout, you can't play with those scissors 'cause they are very very dang'rous." Scout is a good little brother too. He replied, "Ooo-tay, Flora." They both came back into the living room without any scissors.

HUGS $1

If I could bottle Scout's hugs I would probably be a billionaire.

There have been a few occasions over the past months that I have felt sad in the evenings -- not sad like depressed, just sad because bad things have happened to good friends. When I am feeling sad, I get the urge to wake up Scout for one of his big hugs. He is seriously the BEST hugger EVER. I joke that hugging is his spiritual gift, but maybe it's not really a joke. If Scout knows you well enough to do more than just stare at you, then it's likely that he's made you feel special. He likes to say, "Hi (fill in your name)!" and people can't help but smile when he greets them with his cute little voice. Between the cheery greetings and the fantastic hugs, he never fails to make me feel good.

He's just such a happy little guy. I like Scout.

it's so funny

"I wish you'd write something on your blog. I need something to read," says my Mother. Oh, the pressure I am under to entertain you people!! :-)

Well, I actually have a REALLY funny story but it is not appropriate for the blog, so you'll have to ask me about it sometime. You're probably gasping in shock that there is anything I consider inappropriate for this blog, right!?? Some things just don't need to be put out there for the whole world to read. It's very funny though . . . I'm giggling just thinking about it . . . I bet you wish you knew the story!!! Cruel, I know. Also, don't ask me to tell you the story unless we are really good friends or relatives. I may also require you to be female . . . I'll have to think about that one. Let's just say I'm reserving the right to refuse to tell the funny story if I don't think it's appropriate for you to hear. Gosh, I bet I've really got you curious now, huh?!? Good.

I had intended to write a few little stories on here, but they just don't compare to the REALLY funny story that I can't tell you. I think I'll just save the blogging for another day when I feel like I have something amusing/exciting/poignant to write.