2010 in review

Facebook status updates from 2010 . . . if you keep up with me on facebook then you've already read all of these. I'd forgotten some of them though! I guess you need to read it from the bottom up for it to make sense..... :-)

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I'm trying to decide which is more important to me: starting the new year with a clean house or ending this year doing something other than cleaning....

A word of advice: if you sign into facebook on your mom's computer make sure you sign out.

Wow... my Mom is so wise. I wish I had appreciated all that wisdom when I was younger. She's pretty cool too. ... always has been. I just ♥ my Mom!

Me: "Are you hungry?"
Chris: "If I had a banana every time someone asked me that . . . I'd never be hungry."
Me: (I don't say anything to that.....because what CAN you say in response to such profound wisdom??)

I love my kids everyday.....but I think I love them even MORE on the days that they all three sleep in until 9am.

It's official, Ladies and Gentlemen -- I am a Fantasy Football Super Bowl Champion!!! I'm scheduling my parade through the city for sometime next week...

I leave my computer unattended for two seconds and come back to find Scout watching a Windows 7 tutorial video????

Upon arriving back home after almost two weeks of Christmas travel, Flora says, "Oh, Mommy! I really like our kitchen!"

Home is calling......

Grandma's Christmas games are awesome!

!!!!ARKANSAS!!!!

Oklahoma!!

And we're off! Long day of driving ahead.....

Three little Borkerts and two not-so-little Borkerts sharing a room......could have been a nightmare but it turned out okay.

Colorado Christmas is wrapping up and Arkansas Christmas is about to begin. An offer to babysit is waiting for us when we get back to KC -- I'm thinking we'll definitely take it!!

First night in CO: Flora and Scout climbed out of their beds and emptied all of our suitcases onto the floor. Second night in CO: Mommy stayed in the room until they were definitely asleep.

Today was probably the best day of Flora's life. She got to watch her shows and drink chocolate milk for 9 hours straight! And today I am thankful for portable DVD players. Good weather, fast trip -- thanks for all the prayers!

Somehow we were able to resist pulling over to view the WORLD'S LARGEST CZECH EGG in Kansas. Sheer willpower.

Kansas makes me crazy.

Timber is 12 weeks old which means today would be my first day back at work if I were going back to work. Been there, done that, didn't like it one bit. SO thankful I get to stay home with these little munchkins.

The Borkert family is attempting a family picture. There WILL be a picture and the whole family WILL be in it.....and that's about all I can promise.

Come home. Get lunch ready for Flora and Scout. Pick up toys and clean up the kitchen a bit. REMEMBER THAT TIMBER IS STILL SLEEPING IN HIS CARSEAT AT THE BOTTOM OF THE STAIRS!! Bring Timber upstairs.

Chris tells me, "You smell like vomit." Thanks, Honey, but I really prefer the term "spit-up."

Well, it's decision time --- either today is laundry day or tomorrow is pajama day.....and they wouldn't necessarily be clean pajamas.

Flora just told me, "Mommy, Jesus is in the bathroom."
Um, ok....And then a minute later, "Mommy, Jesus is out of the bathroom now."
Did Jesus just use my bathroom?? :-) I don't know where she comes up with this stuff!!

Crackling fire. Hot chocolate with marshmallows on top. Sleeping baby. Cute husband. Life is good!

Wishing the deer would just come surrender at our doorstep this year.......

Today I told Scout (in my superexcited voice), "SCOUT! You will be TWO-YEARS-OLD tomorrow!" Unimpressed with my theatrics, he replied, "No, I will be five."

I TOTALLY forgot to feed the kids breakfast before church today . . . major mom fail. Now I know why I was able to get everyone out the door quicker than usual!

Flora tried on a new skirt and Scout said, "Flora is a princess!" What a good brother.

Thanks to Dora, Scout always calls for help in Spanish -- Ayúdeme, Mommy, ayúdeme!!!

I just heard Flora tell Scout to go to pbskids.org. Hmm....maybe a bit too much tv for them since Timber was born.....

Flora says, "Our church is like a house but it has a horn on it." Horn = steeple.

Halloween costumes for the kids: Eeny, Meeny, Miney, and NO MO!! :-)

"punkmans"

Kids: check. Minivan: check. Huge Purse: check. Undereye Circles: check. And today I finally made this mom gig official by getting a perm! "Where my kids at?" :-)

Flora just drew a picture of "Jesus Borkert." Hmm.....

I left a roll of toilet paper in Flora's room so she could blow her nose during the night. Guess what I found this morning? Yep, Flora had tp'd her own room.

"Flora's Special Day" was fun and exhausting. Tonight she pat Timber on the head and told me, "Our new baby will be okay because I'm here and I'm three." I wonder how long he will be "our new baby"?? We bought our van in April and it's STILL "our new van," so I guess the nickname could stick for a while.....

Exactly three years ago I was wandering around Kmart with Chris to distract myself from the painful contractions I was experiencing. Tonight I was frantically rushing into Kmart ten minutes before closing to buy a Dora pinata for my almost-three-year-old baby girl's birthday tomorrow!!

I will take the stained HappyMom t-shirt over the shiny SuperMom cape any day.

I feel like a collector who finally has the complete set. :-)

3 kids down for naps at the same time today!! Woohoo!! This is going to be SO easy...... ;-)

I asked Flora what she wanted for her birthday and she said, "Ummm, a pink cake and candles and balloons . . . and a fork." I guess we'll wrap the fork.

**Timber David Borkert**

8lbs 11oz, 21inches!! Born at 5:40pm. Whew--so glad that's over! He's such a cutie!! (name to be finalized this evening!!)

We had a yummy breakfast-for-lunch at IHOP today . . . or, as Flora called it, IJUMP.

Already this evening, Flora has played in a sandbox and swam in a pool in our living room. I'm glad she has an active imagination so we don't actually need to own a sandbox or a pool!

Flora has a stuffy nose which, according to her, is basically the end of the world.

Today I bought a gallon of milk that expires on my due date. Made me smile and freak out a little.

Scout knocked over Flora's tower of blocks. "Scout," she says, "that was my best friend in the whole wide world!" Hmm....maybe we need to work on finding more friends for Flora.

The kids are already playing together! Flora and Scout like to give the baby "zerberts" and he kicks back. Unfortunately this game leaves me with a stomach covered in toddler slobber and sore ribs. It will be much more fun when they can play without me in the middle!

I can't feed Flora "baby carrots" without explaining where the "mommy carrots" are.

First thing I heard this morning: "Mommy! Mommy! Your baby come out of your belly yet??"

"But Mommy, bugs are still people." ~ Flora

I was really excited to purchase a HUGE bottle of great smelling lotion until I got home and realized it was conditioner.

Chris is talking to a guy from high school on the phone. I'm eavesdropping. They are talking about diapers and potty training. My, my how times have changed! :-)

Dear Friends and Relatives: We do not have a name picked out for this baby. I know that you all think we have a secret name that we're not telling, but honestly, we just don't know. Still taking suggestions......

"You're kinda like a whale," Flora says.

I am thankful for the blessing of an ordinary day. Sometimes boring isn't so bad.

Gotta love the honesty of a 2-year-old......I asked Flora why Scout was crying and she said, "Ummmm, probby 'cause I bite him."

Busy busy weekend......Flora woke up from her nap and said "Let's put my hair in a ponytail so we can go." She was confused when I told her that we weren't going anywhere tonight.

Little girls like to feel pretty and little boys like to feel important......just an observation.

"Mommy, I want to play laundry too!!!"

Scout squeezes his GlowWorm to play music, then very seriously points a finger at it and says "NO," and then burst into giggles. I wish I could bottle his 1-year-old joy and make Flora take a dose of it when she has her I'm-an-emotional-wreck-of-a-2-year-old moments.

Scout must be growing up . . . someone asked me if he and Flora were twins today.

Scout started crying so I asked Flora what she did to him. She said, "I just pimpin' him." Okaaaay . . . after observing, I learned that "pimpin'" = pinching. I wasn't happy about her pinching him, but it's certainly better than "pimpin'" him!

Flora is chasing Scout around the house with kitchen tongs saying, "Don't be scared, Scout, I'm a doctor!" My advise is "run, Scout, run!!"

Flora + Callie + Scout + Elliott = tons of energy and tons of fun but very little clothing.

I finally found a Mommy's Day Out program that meets both my budget and standard of care requirements . . . his name is Chris Borkert and he is excellent. I got so much done this morning!!!

I asked Flora what she wanted to do today. Her answer? "Walk, eat, go poo-poo." I'm fairly certain that today will meet all of her expectations.

Chris says, "Oh crap"...... and Flora says, "Oh crap."

I completed my first ever 5k today . . . 5 months pregnant . . . pushing a double stroller . . . in the rain. I am completely okay with my time of 1 hour 3 minutes!!

Scout's first black eye makes him look like a tough little dude....unfortunately his sister gave him the black eye which significantly lowers his toughness factor.

"Mommy, something stuck in my bum." = Flora's first wedgie.

"Sorry, Flora, we have to leave the park because your brother won't quit eating dirt."

Forgot Scout yesterday. I thought Chris had him; Chris thought I had him. We realized in the driveway (after locking up the house and turning off the lights) that no one had Scout. Looked up to see him plastered against the front window---silently staring at us. :-)

Does every mother have those moments when she thinks, "Man, my kids are WEIRD"??

After getting dressed this morning, Flora looked in the mirror and declared, "Oh, I look wonderful!"

BOY!!!!!!!

BOY or GIRL???? The request line is open for the next 16 hours! :-)

Chris decided we needed fish, so he brought home a goldfish each for Flora and Scout. By the end of the evening, both of the fish were dead. So that wasn't great . . . and then I thoughtlessly fixed fish sticks for lunch today. Oops.

.....and now we have a new goldfish who seems to be adjusting better than the other two --- he's still alive so we're obviously doing something right this time. He is orange and black and his name, of course, is Pink.

This fish is definitely dead.

I've done so many things as a mom that I never imagined I'd do . . . like playing Chris' ukulele and singing the "clean-up sing" while Flora chants "Louder Mommy! Sing louder!"

Today there's a character on Barney named Sir Rip-a-lot. The kids don't understand why I keep giggling.

"Until 10 weeks [in utero], every brain is female. Then, in boys, a huge surge of testosterone hits the brain, killing cells in the communication center and growing them in the sex and aggression center." Haha!!

Scout had no fear on the chick-fil-a indoor playground. He was up the steps and in the tunnels before Flora knew what was going on . . .

Laundry day --- YUCK!! ....but the little pink and blue piles make me smile.

Flora burst into tears while watching Winnie the Pooh. I guess we'll stick with our four staples for a bit longer (Dora, Elmo, Barney and WonderPets). THEY never make her cry. Stupid Tigger.

Chris is implementing a new organization strategy that will revolutionize his life. Unfortunately, his organization is scattered all over the dining room table and floor and piled in my chair.

I played with blocks alone after the kids went to bed because they never let me build the tower that *I* want to build. I think it turned out pretty spectacular.

I couldn't sleep last night and I thought what if Jay married Kay and they had three kids named Elle, Em 'n' Opie . . .

I had no idea that a little red-headed boy would attract so much attention! It's like the hair compels people to comment on its redness.

Day 4 of kids being sick . . . hoping, praying, wishing, dreaming, begging for a vomit-free day tomorrow.

Flora yells, "DRINK!" and Scout runs to fetch it for her. I'm glad they're figuring out this big sister/little brother thing.

My hair is up in a ponytail for the first time in quite a while. Flora just noticed and said, "Oh! So beautiful, Mommy!" LOL . . . Gotta love kids!!

Flora and Chris are playing basketball . . . Flora's version of basketball requires Chris to "WIGGLE WIGGLE" before each shot. I should be recording this!

I bought NEON GREEN paint today so Chris can officially convert the basement to his green screen room. I am an awesome wife.

All these new toys and "mommy-on-the-floor" is still their favorite toy . . .

FIRST status update of 2010 . . . all of my other updates will have to live up to this one . . . that's a lot of pressure.